Underdogs: 1-3 (12-17)
Locks: 5-1 (29-8)
Survivor: 5-1 LVR, TB, IND, DEN, DAL, NE, KC
Brady/Bellichick Breakup Scorekeeper: Bill’s Pats have a real QB problem that has cost them two consecutive games against struggling teams. Tom scored 5 total TDs and took the lead in all-time TD passes. Decisive point Tom. (Bill: 2.5 Tom: 5)
Title Belt: TB won from LVR (1 week reign)
Needles: 1-2-0 (6-7-8) [Favourite won, dog covered/favourite covered/dog won]
Don Shula Award Finalist: PIT (6-0)
Matt Millen/Sashi Brown Award Finalist: NYJ (0-7)
- Eagles over Giants
I went out on a limb to pick the Giants and this is how they fucking repay me: by botching an 11-point lead in the last few minutes. - Team over Cowboys
I watched The Replacements this week. Man, that is a terrible movie, huh? I love Keanu Reeves and Jon Favreau but even they kinda suck in that. Just blatant anti-union dreck. If it weren’t for the players union, both Dak Prescott and Andy Dalton would probably be totally on their own right now as Dallas tries to move forward with some sub-Shane-Falco-level guy off the street throwing the ball. - Steelers over Titans
The Titans fell way behind, stormed all the way back, and then missed the kick that would have forced OT. All the while the Steelers put up over 30 points without giving Chase Claypool more that 1.5 fantasy points. Fuck the Steelers, it’s bullshit that they get to be the last undefeated team. - Bills over Jets but Jets cover the spread
New York came out with a new verve under the leadership of the returning Sam Darnold. Their valiant stand meant losing by 8 points. The Bills could have covered if they kicked a chip shot field goal as time expired, but instead they kneeled on like the 10 yard line. Not a great sign that they struggled so much to win this game. - Saints over Panthers
Without Michael Thomas or Emanuel Sanders the Saints scraped by Carolina. I would normally be concerned by how close this game was, but with how competitive the Panthers have been and how cursed the Saints have been, I’m just glad to keep up with Tampa. - Packers over Texans
Aaron Rodgers will not let Russell Wilson run away with that MVP award. If DeShaun Watson was on either of their teams, I’m sure he’d be in that conversation too. - Browns over Bengals
A truly entertaining game, Baker Mayfield was 0/7 with a pick after the first quarter, and something like 15/18 for 300 yards and 3 TDs after that, including one to my almost-picked-up-on-fantasy-this-week TE David Njoku. The TD put the Browns ahead but the missed PAT lost my bet on their 3.5-point spread, because they’re still the Browns. And they also lost OBJ to an ACL tear, because they are still the Browns. - Lions over Falcons
You can take away the Falcons’ head coach but you can’t take away their curse. Todd Gurley tries to give himself up in the field of play with 1 minute left so Atlanta can burn the clock and kick a game winning field goal, but he accidentally falls into the end zone to go up 6 points and give the time-out-less Lions about 55 seconds to get all the way down the field. Which of course they do. Incredible. - Chargers over Jaguars
Justin Herbert is now required to grow a mustache. - Niners over Patriots!
This does not make the Broncos’ win last week look very good. Are the Niners back or is Cam just still post-Covid symptomatic? That shit is serious. - Chiefs over Broncos
You know we actually played a lot of this game well, it’s just the multiple catastrophic failures that bit us in the ass. One of those losses that just makes you feel like you’re a long way from being any good at all. - Buccs over Raiders
NGL I have not paid any attention to what happened in this game. - Cardinals over Seahawks in OT
Remember when these teams went to overtime in a primetime game and there were 3 missed kicks between them and it ended in a 6-6 tie? Those were the days. Shoutout to Tyler Lockett for 16 caches, 200 yards and 3 TDs, and to Deandre Hopkins for driving around Phoenix flipping off trump supporters before the game. - Rams over Bears
Jared Goff failed to score the 67 points I needed to win my fantasy matchup so screw him. The Bears were always fake and I’m glad they lost this game.
Dangersquirrel vs the NFL 