Underdogs: 0-4 (3-6)
Locks: 5-0 (10-1)
Survivor: 2-0 LVR, TB
Brady/Bellichick Breakup Scorekeeper: Point Tom, because the entire world knew to defend the QB keeper on the last play (Bill: 1 Tom: 1)
Title Belt: KC defended from LAC (4 week reign)
Needles: 1-2-1 (1-2-3)
- CLE over CIN
The Browns don’t get a lot of chances to look good and the Bengals don’t get a lot of chances to look competitive, so props to both of them. Joe Burrow looks like the real deal, and that’s in a game where he threw over 60 passes, which was like a full season’s workload for Johnny Unitas. - PIT over DEN
We’re fucking cursed. There’s no style points in the NFL so I take no solace in “keeping it close” when we’re dealing with injury issues with Von Miller, Phillip Lindsay, Courtland Sutton, AJ Bouye, Jerry Jeudy, and oh yeah Drew Lock. Our season ended before it began. Maybe it’s a sign. - GB over DET
Remember how last season the Lions trailed the Packers for 0:00 of game time and yet went 0-2? Hilarious.
Devante Adams got injured in this game so best hope that’s not serious. - TEN over JAX
Jacksonville managed to be tied 30-30 with less than 10 minutes left. They’re gonna be like this all season, aren’t they? - SF over NYJ
The 49ers left in a body bag and somehow the Jets still couldn’t even cover. If Joey Bosa, Jimmy Garoppolo, and/or Raheem Mostert are out for significant time, that would be catastrophic.
Adam Gase is definitely getting fired midseason. - BUF over MIA
The Josh Allen to Stephon Diggs connection came to life in this game. Miami stayed in it either because they’re scrappy or because the Bills are scrappy without the ‘s’. Might take awhile to really find out which. - DAL over ATL
Nobody gives up a lead like the Falcons. They are the champs. They led 20-0 at one point and 39-24 with 8:00 on the clock. It’s great to have a game where I wish ill on both teams because a mess like the end of this game can happen and I can just laugh. Please replace the onside kick. - CHI over NYG
The Bears won on a goalline stand so I would have had this pick right if Saquon Barkley didn’t lose his leg in the second quarter. - IND over MIN
I was right to not trust Philip Rivers but I would have been even more righter to not trust Kirk Cousins. - TB over CAR
Brady didn’t really look any better but the Buccaneers as a team sure did! Brady leaning on good coaching and supporting cast, now where have I heard that one before? - LAR over PHI
I should have trusted my initial instincts. Sean McVay sans Todd Gurley is a free man. - ARI over WSH
Haskins was indeed a problem, and Deandre Hopkins is a Problem. - KC over LAC (OT)
Fuck you, Chiefs. Can’t even lose right, goddamn. Justin Herbert played this whole game after Tyrod Taylor injured his chest in pregame, and if he had just scrambled for an easy 1st down instead of throwing a pick in the red zone in the 3rd quarter he would have completed the upset. - BAL over HOU
I haven’t even looked at stats or highlights for this game, but I know JK Dobbins did jack shit for me in fantasy. - SEA over NE
No matter how they approach play calling the Seahawks will find a way to give me a heart attack. Feeling good about the Russell Wilson MVP pick since he has more TDs than incompletions so far this year. The Pats are really playing “live fast die young” with Cam Newton, and so far the payoff is pretty damn good. - NO LVR
Yeah I was worried about that.
Dangersquirrel vs the NFL 